Anger is an issue that a lot of people have to deal with. It is a very powerful emotion that stems from a lot of events in a person's life. Stress makes you angry, a feeling of loss of control makes you angry, and feeling disrespected or unheard makes you feel angry, too. Many of these situations occur in family units. Family therapy can help in all of the following ways when you are attempting to resolve anger issues.
Putting into Words What Makes You Angry
Parents are angry with kids. Kids are angry with parents. Parents or kids are angry with partners or siblings. Why all of you are angry is the big problem. Most people do not stop to put into words why they are angry. They just scream, shout, and say nasty things. A therapist gets family members to take turns verbalizing what makes them angry. If there is a particular situation that makes everyone angry, the therapist spends extra time on resolving this one issue.
Digging Deeper Emotionally
Anger is a "safer," easier emotion to go to when another emotion makes people too uncomfortable. For example, if your child says something that is extremely offensive or hurtful, you do not want to show them how much that hurts. Instead, you get mad to hide the fact that you are hurt, and then you strike back in an angry manner. The therapist first addresses the fact that your child said something hurtful. Helping the child to understand that words hurt is the first step to resolving the anger that ultimately occurs.
Then the therapist helps you find a better way to respond to the hurtful words your child said. Surprisingly, when your child says that he/she "hates you," you can respond that you love him/her anyway and walk away. This often causes the child to realize that what he/she said was hurtful, and he/she will eventually apologize for what was said.
A lot of anger can be avoided when people communicate better. You need to know how to talk to your children in clear, concise ways that speak respectfully to them. Then your children will emulate and learn how to speak respectfully to you and other adults. When you all stop and take a breath, and think through what you need to say or want to say, you can be less angry and react with less anger.
For more information, contact a company like The A Treatment Center.